Fathers and the Family Home: Your Rights and Your Children's

There is a widespread assumption that, when a marriage ends, the mother keeps the home and the children while the father simply pays. That picture is out of date. Both the property law and the law on children are built around fairness and the children's welfare, not the gender of the parent.

The home is divided on fairness, not gender

Under section 7 of the Matrimonial Causes Act, a father has exactly the same right to a fair share of the matrimonial home as a mother, and the same recognition for what he contributed, in money and otherwise. Moving out of the home, or being blamed for the breakup, does not forfeit his share. See Dividing the Matrimonial Home and the myths that cost spouses their property rights.

The law on children changed in 2022

The Guardianship of Minors Amendment Act of 2022 brought both parents to equality. Mothers and fathers now have equal rights of guardianship and custody, whether they were married or not, exercised in consultation with each other. Custody is decided on the best interests of the child, and is no longer automatically handed to the mother. A father can be granted sole or joint custody. The Children's Amendment Act of 2023 went further still, reinforcing shared parental responsibility.

Four things every father should know

1. You have equal guardianship. Major decisions about a child's schooling, health and upbringing are for both parents, in consultation, not for one alone.
2. Custody is about the children, not gender. A court decides on the children's best interests, and fathers can and do receive custody.
3. Access is a right. If the children live mainly with their mother, you still have the right to a real, ongoing relationship with them.
4. Maintenance and contact go together. Supporting your children and being present in their lives are both yours to give and to claim.

A calmer path serves everyone

Fathers tend to get the best, and least bitter, outcomes through a collaborative approach that keeps them in their children's lives, rather than a drawn out fight that hardens both sides. See What Is Collaborative Divorce and Keeping the House for the Children.